As I read in chapter 6 of Made to Crave earlier today I was really struck by this question in the ‘Personal Reflections’ at the end of the chapter.
“As Christians, our calling — and our source of spiritual nourishment — is to do God’s will and finish His work (John 4:34). To what degree have consuming thoughts about food impacted your ability to pursue your calling and receive spiritual nourishment?”
I realized when I am consumed with food, overeating or snacking when bored, etc, I begin to feel guilty. Those feelings of guilt usually begin roll into a huge burden of shame that then threatens to crush any positive thoughts and leaves a path of worry and wonder behind it.
“Why am I still struggling?” “Why do I do this?” “Haven’t I learned anything?”
Many times those crushing thoughts steal away hours in my day and I don’t get things done that I need to do. This is usually because I then find myself searching for reasons why I’m doing what I’m doing, reading weight loss stories online or in conversation with a weight loss buddy or even in a book or my Bible.
There is a time and a place for these moments of deep introspection and learning. However, more often than not I’m doing this too often and it becomes a thief of my time. I’m then left with only enough time to do the basic activities of daily living, and sometimes even those things are completed in a rushed manner to make up for lost time.
In a day where I’ve been consumed with food and weight related worries there is no time for extra things, maybe working on something I’ve felt God calling me to do like visit with a friend in need or work on a project for church.
Or I may also have lost time in my day for reading a book or working on a family project, and then I am stressed out because I feel I’ve had no time to myself in the day.
This is not healthy, and it is something I am going to work on.
I am going to work on sticking to my plan, and not letting my mind become consumed with food – in a good or bad way – so that I can have more full, productive days. Our lives where meant to be lived to the fullest, not bogged down with heavy, destructive thoughts or habits.
I know with God’s help and my good choices I’ll gain a victory in this area of my life. My hope is I’ll also begin losing weight again as well.