Weigh-In … Maxed Out

Posted on December 14, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding
Today’s Weight:  165.5
Loss/Gain:  -2.0 lbs.
I think I’ve reached my holiday limit of extra curricular activities for the year.  🙂  I’m not overly booked, but I’m at my limit for 2012.
If anyone asks, “Ms. Leah can you…” I have no problem saying, “No.” as of today.  🙂 
I’m saying all of this because the extra busy hustle and bustle going on around here this year finally lead me to a point I didn’t want to hit with regards to my healthiness journey. 
I have not exercised since Monday.  That is not to say I haven’t been on the go, on my feet and staying busy all day, but I had to make a conscious decision to let the gym slide for a day or two..or three to complete some Christmastime projects.  
That is to say, to complete them and not let my house go to pot.  I’ve learned that if I’m busy staying involved in things and my house goes to pot I become a stressed out wreck, and none of the events I’m involved with are worth that kind of craziness.  
I don’t regret skipping the gym.  I miss that I didn’t exercise, but I have been so productive getting things done these last three days that it was worth the sacrifice.  Plus, it made me be even more careful about my eats, because I knew I wasn’t burning all kinds of cardio calories. 
Which is where I go back to by weigh-in.  165.5 oh how I’ve missed you!  
With about two weeks left in 2012 I most likely will not hit 159, so I’ve decided if I can at least finish down near my lowest weight of 164 I will be content.  This week I ended up dealing with lots of stuff I put off doing (see procrastination post below..) so I couldn’t get to the gym; however, next week I should be able to make it at least 3 days.  
This is an ongoing journey, and Christmastime is part of the journey.  As always, I’m not giving up, but giving in to the reality of where I’m at right now. 
So, now I leave you with two things I finished this week (that I wanted done the first weekend of December..lol) that I’m totally thrilled with.  

Have a wonderful weekend and thank you all for checking in.  I am truly blessed by the friendly support of blogland friends.  🙂
Note: Credit and tutorials for wreaths:
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Tuesdays Unwrapped – Procrastination

Posted on December 12, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding
I spent a good part of my day today cleaning my mini blinds.  Mini blinds are a blessing and a curse all at once.  While they do work well in blocking sun and keeping prying eyes out at night, I don’t care for them.  And quite honestly, they are really the one thing I hate cleaning. 
Which is why I spent hours that could’ve been better spent finishing up Christmas cards, or cleaning up craft clutter, or finishing Christmas decorating, or baking cookies for a cookie drop at the base, but instead…
…I was dipping my hands in this bucket with soapy water and bleach. 
Because I procrastinated.
I knew they needed cleaning back in the summer, but I didn’t do it.
I really wanted to do a deep fall cleaning before Thanksgiving and company arriving, but I didn’t make time for it. 
Now, I’m hosting a party and am thoroughly disgusted by my dusty blinds, so I’m forced to take time away from other more fun activities to do my least favorite chore.  In the middle of Christmas.  😦
And all day I’ve been thinking about how I am going to post this as my “Tuesdays Unwrapped” post because procrastination is a problem for me and sometimes it threatens to ruin my holidays if I don’t plan ahead.  
It’s where I’m at today.
Where I’m also at is finally sitting down to write this post and feeling like an idiot.
Because when I checked at the original blog where I got the idea I was reminded that I’m not just supposed to share the “lovely, messy and unexpected..”, but I’m supposed to share in a way that unwraps a special moment.
Um, folks, there’s nothing special about stressing out about the to-do’s because I procrastinated on a cleaning job.  Which has all been made worse because nothing really got done yesterday as planned, so I kind of lost those hours as well.  Plus, all day I kept thinking about how procrastination is a horrible trait when trying to lose weight, because it drags the losing process on and on when you put off sticking to the plan.
That doesn’t make for a warm fuzzy post.
However, I was reminded that procrastinating doesn’t help anything, ever.
And as I sit and ponder this post, rewriting, tweaking, etc.  I’m also reminded that everything will get done.  *deep cleansing breath*  
The house doesn’t have to be perfect for the party.  
The food is planned and will all get made on time.
About 99% of my Christmas shopping is done.
The bills are paid.
My family is safe and sound.
And…my blinds look lovely…even if the rest of the house is a mess right now.  The hard work did pay off.
‘Nite.  🙂
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Weigh-In … Keeping My Priorities Straight

Posted on December 7, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding
Today’s Weight: 167.5
Loss/Gain:  -1.0
Yay!  I’m not up!! Good thing, because my emotional self needed something positive this morning.  Oh, it’s nothing more than…yep…TOM.
Earlier this week I was like, “Why can I not get myself together and back in to weight-loss mode??”  Sheesh.  Um, now I know.  I should’ve known because of the craving for soda and chocolate earlier in the week.  *rolling eyes*  Hello…that’s my cue.  lol 
Despite the PMS I was more conscious to get my water in, track my food most days and I completed my 4th workout of the week this morning.  It’s not always easy, but I’m really trying to enjoy the hustle and bustle of holiday preparations while keeping my priorities straight. 
This involves planning and preparation. 
This holiday season is one of the busiest our family has seen in a while due to my daughters being in basketball, my son playing indoor soccer and a few Christmas production practices going on throughout the week that we’re all in involved in.  Every evening is full of something, so that means my crafting, shopping, party planning, wrapping, baking, mailing, etc. etc. needs to pretty much get done during the daytime.  
With all this going on I have found myself over this past week constantly keeping a running checklist in my mind of what needs to be done and by when.  Over the past years it’s been easy to push my exercise to the side during December, and I honestly don’t criticize anyone who does this time of year; however, I’ve found for me that when I start my day out taking care of my spiritual and physical self properly I feel much better. 
So, I have made a conscious choice that I will stick to my devotional time and then my gym time as soon as I get home from taking the kids to school.  Maybe I won’t get as much done each day as I hoped, or maybe it means I am going to be going constantly all day and not be able to rest until late in the evening, but I will make sure to do it.  
And you know [insert contented sigh] I feel so much better for it.  Now off to clean my floors and check that off today’s to-do list!  
Thanks for stopping by!  Oh, and feel free to share how you keep your health a priority during this time of year.  
Have a great weekend! 
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Tuesdays Unwrapped – One Day They’ll Be Gone

Posted on December 4, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding
I came across a blog with this great idea for taking a moment out of each busy holiday week to stop and unwrap the gifts around us that can not be placed under a Christmas tree.
It’s called Tuesdays Unwrapped and I’m going to take a moment and break away from my weight loss posts and share a Tuesdays Unwrapped post with you every Tuesday from now til Christmas. 
That being said my unwrapped moment is summed up in this photo, (which my husband and son are both asking why on earth I took a picture of the mess in the living room?? lol) 
I took this picture as a reminder to myself that the people who left these things lying around won’t always be in my home.  Yes, it’s a mess and it can drive me crazy at times, but it’s a mess left by the ones I love the most.  
So, while my instinct is to think, “I have so much to do today without having to pick up after everyone!!!” today I’m choosing to pause, be grateful for my husband and children, because there will be moments in the future that I’ll wish there was something to pick up, or someone living here to holler at to pick up their things.  🙂
Want to see more Tuesdays Unwrapped?  Click here.
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Motivational Monday – This Could Be A Problem

Posted on December 3, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding

Lately I’m having this problem with my wedding ring: 

With the colder weather comes colder fingers and my ring often slides sideways or upside down.
No, I’m not sad, and no it’s not so big that it shakes off easily…yet.  Periodically I check to see if it fits on my middle finger, because I remember when my mom lost a bunch of weight once and had to wear her ring on her middle finger until she could get it resized.  🙂 
Not yet..but soon! 
And this is one of those little things that motivates me to keep working on my weight loss. 
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Weigh-In … A Gain & Two Things

Posted on November 30, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding
Today’s Weight:  168.5
Loss/Gain: +2.0 since last Thursday, but -2.0 since last Friday.
As my mom said, “Happy Holidays, huh?” Sigh…yes.   Needless to say I wasn’t “on track” over Thanksgiving and the only silver lining on that cloud of gain is that I am down from last Friday.  Unfortunately, I’m having a bit of a time getting back on track and am worried about my Finish Strong challenge. 
I am one month away from the finish and I’ve actually gained a couple pounds since the beginning of the challenge.  *rolling eyes*  Sheesh.  *shamefully shaking head*
But instead of getting depressed I want to share two things today:
1)  Thank you to my fellow bloggers who commented and encouraged me to keep pressing towards my seemingly impossible weight goal.  I have been discussing with a good friend about how a girl I know has put some weight back on (after reaching a healthy weight) and keeps mentioning that she thinks she’s just good at that weight and it makes me want to justify not losing any more myself.  
I think this girl might be about where I’m at now – if we did a heigh:weight ratio, so it’s been almost like an excuse for me, because I find myself thinking, “Well, if she feels fine and is staying active, then why should I try and lose more??”  However, like I said earlier this week I know my eating is not where it needs to be and thus I can not allow myself to make excuses about reaching a healthy weight.  
So, I won’t give up and I know I must press on.  
Which leads me to my next thought…
2)  Wednesday I had my physical assessment with the trainer at the gym.  The results were amazing to me and reminded me of how far I’ve come and why I want to continue towards my healthy weight.
Okay, well, honestly…they were another reason I could see why the girl I mentioned above might not worry about getting back to a healthy weight…when you’ve seen yourself come so far you almost don’t feel the need to continue. 
The trainer doesn’t know my story, but I do and so I was very pleased to see these this information on my assessment printout: 
My “body age” registered at:  31  ,  but I’m really 36.  
My body fat percentage: 20.3 …and fell in the “optimal” range
Max VO2 (cardiovascular testing):  67.7  ...or at the top of “Very Good” .. next level being “Elite”
My overall fitness fell 2/3 towards the top of “Good”..next level was excellent and the top of the chart.
ME?!?! 
In GOOD fitness shape and with a body fat percentage in a good range…with 25 pounds left to lose?  
You know I understand the need to get to at least the high end of a healthy weight and thus the need to stay focused and keep working on weight loss, but it felt really good to see on paper Wednesday that I’m no longer the couch potato, overweight mom who never thought she’d be “like those people” who were healthy.  
So, I still need to lose more weight.  I will.  But for today, and in the face of this yucky holiday gain, I feel good and I resolve to do my best to complete my Finish Strong challenge and … well… finish strong.  
As always, no matter what… I won’t quit.  Thanks for checking in on me.  
Happy Friday!
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Maybe I Should Feel Ugly and Fat?

Posted on November 28, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding
So, after posting yesterday I also had another thought about how the taller lady feels so fat and ugly and I’m about the same size, but don’t feel fat and ugly.
Maybe I need to feel just a little ugly and fat..just enough to urge myself to finish the weight loss already.  I’m kind of joking, but kind of serious here.
Three-and-a-half years and 65 pounds lost and I feel so good right now. 
I can run 3 miles like no big deal, I’m in a comfy size 14 and I get complimented on how small I am.
But I’m thinking this is the flip side to loving yourself. 
Just like I realized ten extra pounds and nine months later after reading the article by Geneen Roth that loving myself doesn’t mean allowing myself to eat whatever and whenever and however much I want, I need to realize I am still not a healthy weight.
Yes, I’m healthier.
But I’m too close to being obese to settle.  I need to finish up what I’ve started. 
Trust me, my not losing more weight is not because my body isn’t responding to diet and exercise anymore.  It’s because I still eat more calories than I burn on a regular basis.  
*openly honest moment here*
I haven’t eaten like I’m trying to lose weight for a bit now and I know it.  I have good moments – meals or even a day or two – but well….I know I can do better. 
I decided last week that I wasn’t going to quit my Finish Strong challenge, but I’ve had the darndest time getting back into the healthy-eating-and-weight-loss-portions groove.
And then my phone rang on Monday.  
“Are you still interested in a personal trainer?,” she said.  
“Oh yes.”, I said and then almost laughed because of where I’m at right now.
So, today I have an appointment with her for an assessment.  The gym I go to on the base offers a free personal trainer for six weeks to help you figure out a good routine that works with your needs and fitness/health goals.  
I’m thinking it’s just the push I need to get back on track.  
She said she’ll be checking my body fat percentage and the like…yep, I’ll feel just fat enough to remind myself that I’m still not a healthy weight.   Okay, well, I’ve felt that fat often enough…but now someone else is going to see it and remind me that I can do better.  Yikes.
But you know what…it couldn’t have come at a better time and I’m grateful, because being honest with ones self is also love.  Facing the facts is love.  And I’m going to love myself right over to that trainer and figure out how to get back on track.
I’ll let you know how it goes.  🙂
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But I Don’t Feel Ugly or Fat

Posted on November 28, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding
So, the other day I was perusing some new-to-me weight loss blogs and I came across a lady who was sick of how fat she was.  As she was beginning her weight loss journey and blog she bemoaned the excess fat on her body and vented about how disgusted she was with herself.  
If I remember correctly, as of that post she was 5′ 8″ and 185.5 pounds.  
Um, I’m about 20 pounds lighter and a full 4 inches shorter.  So, basically I’m about the same size or even bigger than this person.  And, well, trust me…my body doesn’t look as thin as hers in my underthings. 
But I don’t feel ugly or fat.  
Now, I understand it sounds like she is at her highest weight and I’m at my adult lowest right now, so we are looking at this size from two very different angles.  However, the self hatred that came across in her post reminded me of an issue I’ve seen in the weight loss world since I began my journey that saddens me. 
Over the years I have watched women verbally abuse themselves about how fat they have gotten.  They are disgusted with how they’ve let themselves go and put on so much weight.   
Many of them are motivated by that disgust to do something about the weight.  However, more times than not I see women get to the goal weight and they still don’t like what they see.  
The self loathing that prompted them to lose weight is still there.  
Sometimes a small amount of weight creeps back on and the loathing begins again; or some constantly chase the strictest diet or exercise regimen in the hopes of getting that perfectly flat stomach, etc. etc.
They’ve reached a healthy weight, but they still can’t love themselves as they are.  
And I find it all very sad. 
You see, I remember an article* I read the summer before I started my weight loss journey wherein the author said a person deserves to love his or herself “even if you never lose another pound”.  I remember I looked in my bedroom mirror and realized I couldn’t truly say I loved myself the way I was – 5’4″ and 220 pounds – and I decided then to try and accept who I was, as I was.  It was hard, but I worked on it.
To this day I truly feel letting go of that self loathing was the real beginning of my journey.
So, to this lady, and all those like her, let me encourage you to learn to love yourself as you are.  Self acceptance will make the journey to lose weight a little bit easier.  And in then end you’ll be happier because you’ll not only feel strong and confident for succeeding in your weight loss journey, but you’ll feel content because you’ve come to accept the body God gave you…imperfections and all. 
*True Kindness Has No Calories by Geneen Roth for Good Housekeeping Magazine
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A Running Discrepancy

Posted on November 26, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding
Ever have that feeling something is too good to be true, and then you find out it is?  
Well, I’ve enjoyed hearing my Nike+ tell me on my runs that I’m averaging a 9:20 – 9:30 minute mile, but I’ve just been so surprised…and wondered if it was true, because I just didn’t think / couldn’t believe I was that fast. and chalked it up to cold weather running.
So, today I wore my Garmin on my run to compare.  The times were the same, but the distances were not.  And my gut instinct seems to be correct. 
My Nike+ on my iPhone said I ran this today: 
But my Garmin said this (bottom right is distance): 
To figure out who was closer to the correct distance I took my car out and drove the path I ran and the odometer came out with this: 
So, it appears my Garmin is correct and the Nike+ GPS is not, which would explain why the Nike+ has this option: 
Edit my run?  I thought the whole point of having this app was to have the Nike+ tell me how far I ran, not for me to program it.  😦
Needless to say I’m a bit sad, but not surprised.  In the races I’ve ran I used my Garmin and my time/distance is usually only seconds different than the race timing chip clocks me at. 
My main upset is that I bragged about my fastest 5K on Thanksgiving morning, which is probably not true.  I’m still around a 33 minute 5K.
Oh well…That’s okay..it just doesn’t sound as good as less than 30 minutes did.  🙂 
Has anyone else had this problem?  I’m going to look into it further and even email Nike+ people and see if I can find out if there is something I’m supposed to do to correct this issue.  
I’ll keep you posted if I hear back from them. 
In the meantime, it was a beautiful day to run today and I enjoyed it immensely.  🙂
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Weigh-In … The Thankful Healthy Blogger 5K

Posted on November 23, 2012 by Leah@MyNewEnding

Today’s Weight:  Yesterday morning I was 166.5.  I was not that this morning, as expected.

I’ve decided not to post a regular weigh-in post this Friday.  Instead you can read about how I was feeling about my Finish Strong challenge here, and I’ll share with you a new Thanksgiving activity I took part in this year.

After posting the other day I decided to commit to participating in this:

So, I planned ahead, got a few things done early and made sure I had time to get up and run before getting started on Thanksgiving preparations.

You’ll notice I beat my 5K time from Tuesday…and came in at under 30 minutes…for the first time ever!! I was super excited about that!!!

Even more fun was that I had talked my friend, Sarah, into running Thanksgiving morning as well.  Since she lives on the other side of the country from me she texted me when she finished her run.

She took a picture too, proof that she was running.

While I did eat more than normal (or like normal overeating on Thanksgiving) I started my day out with activity and it felt great.

Have a nice weekend!

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