Back-To-School Challenge – Week 2

Posted on August 1, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding

Here are the stats:

Chris: This week’s loss/gain -1.8 lbs.
Total Loss So Far: – 17.1 lbs.
Leah
This week’s loss/gain +1.0
Total Loss So Far: -11.5 lbs.
As you can see, Chris is making the challenge just fine. She is dedicated and keeps up the hard work! You go girl!! 🙂
I’m deciding if I’ll ever do a challenge again because I’m just not making regular, good losses each week. I think challenges scare me for this very reason. I’m currently just glad that I exercise regularly and haven’t decided to quit losing weight already. 🙂 Here’s to another week!
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New Thoughts

Posted on July 31, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding

After my gain this week I have to tell you that I know things are changing for the better in me because of how I think. I know I worked out at least 4 times this week. I know where I went wrong in my choices of how much and what foods I ate. Instead of wanting to quit and give up, I’m okay with it. I will keep working on this and THAT is not the way I would’ve thought before. . … I would’ve wanted to give up or just go and pig out and think that it will come off eventually, but I’m not going to try and change things now.

No more. Slowly and surely I’m learning where I need to change things and I’m willing to do that.

My friend, Stephanie, noticed this a few posts back and I just have to share with you all that it is truly a miracle how my thinking is changing. Glory!!!
p.s. Last night I bought Oreos for the kids…and I didn’t have even one!!!!! I almost had one, but I was afraid that once I tasted it I would want more. So, instead I sat myself down with a skinny cow ice cream bar. I LOVE OREOS, so this was a big thing for me. 🙂
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Weigh-In … Early Weigh-In

Posted on July 31, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding

Today I’m taking my twin 11-year-old daughters to see a “school version” of Les Miserables at a local little theatre and then we are going to stay in a hotel for the night. Just us girls. Since I won’t be home tomorrow for weigh-in I weighed myself today.

Today’s Weight: 219.5
This week’s Loss/Gain: + 1.0 lb.
Total Loss So Far: – 11.5 lbs.
I’ll be honest that I didn’t want to post this because I was embarrassed of the gain. However, I decided a few days ago when I was feeling like I knew I was going to be up this week that I wasn’t going to post a “will-it-ever-come-off” post. No pity party here. I had a very busy week, ate some high-calorie foods last weekend that actually had me up on the scale and then I tried to fix it, and I did to some extent. I am only up a pound, versus 3-5, so that is a good thing.
I also learned that I need more fiber in my diet and really need to cut the higher fat things out. I didn’t really even go really high on calories (except Sunday yikes!), but I ate potato chips and white bread more than normal. I journaled it and didn’t go over my calories, but I think those starchy foods are getting me. hhmm….
So, I’m going to go clean my floors, then pack and shower before we head off on our mini girls-only vacation. I will keep pressing on and I WILL win in the end.
Have a good weekend!
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The Right Tools

Posted on July 30, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding

Last weekend I was hungry and noticed we were low on fresh fruit and vegetables. There was really nothing for me to grab for a snack or to add to my dinner (ie. a salad) and it was a bit hard to be careful what I ate. So, Monday I made sure to get to the grocery store to stock back up on fruit and some fresh vegetables. It made it much easier to grab lunch and make dinner and not feel like I was going to go “out of control” calorie wise since I had healthy choices to choose from.

I was reminded that having the right tools really makes all the difference. So, here’s a list of the tools that I have and that I’m so grateful for:
1. Good support system – My husband and some close friends who regularly encourage me, are working on weight loss with me and listen when I just need to talk about my weight loss struggles.
2. Income to support making healthier meals and to buy lots fresh fruits and vegetables to have on hand.
3. A workout routine that I really enjoy – Leslie Sansone’s Walk At Home DVDs are my daily workout and I LOVE them!
4. Motivation – Other websites and blogs that I can read regularly to encourage, direct and help me to keep on track on this weight loss journey. Diane at http://www.fittothefinish.com is my biggest help right now and I’m so glad I found her site!
5. SparkPeople.com – I joined this FREE website to utilize their FREE food tracking tools. The journaling really helps me out.
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Against All Odds

Posted on July 27, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding

We began revival services at our church yesterday morning and already God has spoken directly to my life. I’m always amazed how sometimes I’m able to relate a sermon to my battle with weight loss. Yesterday morning he preached about facing the odds. He mentioned that despite all the odds that may seem stacked against us we can make it as Christians in a wicked world.

Well, I was thinking this morning that it’s the same with my weight loss. Despite the odds stacked against me – weight gain history in the women in my family, past failures at weight loss attempts, etc. – I can win in this battle. It may not seem easy at times, but it is possible. I can and will win in the end.
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Gastric Bypass..Yes or No?

Posted on July 27, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding

Diane from Fit to the Finish wrote about whether to have gastric bypass surgery or not on her blog today. I decided to post here the comment that I left on her site.

My opinion on gastric bypass surgery:

I have four friends who have all had gastric bypass surgery. I know for sure that three of them were told by their pastor that the surgery would either be their deliverance from the battles with food, or they would still need a deliverance from those battles (emotional issues, mindsets, etc.) For two of them it seemed to be the deliverance, but one of them gained it all back and has no exercise habits nor good eating habits in place now. This was her second weight loss surgery in about 15-20 years, and the doctors told her she can’t do it again.

I also have one good friend who had it done and I was with her from the surgery and through all office visits afterwards. She has kept the weight off for 3-4 years now with continued good eating habits and regular exercise. It was not easy to watch her go through the surgery, strict eating, almost choking because she hadn’t chewed her food down small enough, but she made it through fine with no major complications. It worked for her the best of the four ladies who I know had it done.

However, I’ve never felt it was for me. Have I wanted to have it done? Sure. I’ve reached my point of hopelessness in times past, but I know that a surgery is not going to solve my emotional issues that are directly linked to my bad eating habits. If I can not change on my own, I’ve felt a surgery is not going to change me.

I agree with you, Diane, that everyone needs to decide what works best for them. I will support those who choose gastric bypass and only pray that in the process they are able to deal seriously with their emotional issues. In the meantime, I will do it the “old fashioned” way and in the process deal with the fears and emotional issues in my life, so that as I reach my physical goal weight I will have gained an emotional victory as well.

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Back-To-School Challenge – Week 1

Posted on July 25, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding
It’s the end of the first week of the Back-To-School Challenge between my friend, Chris, and I. It’s just a short little challege where we are both trying to lose 20 pounds by August 8th, just before our kids go back to school.
We both showed a loss this week. Hooray!
Stats as of July 25th:
Chris’ loss so far: -15.4
Leah’s loss so far: -12.5
Two more weeks to go. I’m sure Chris will make it and I will do my best to get as close as possible. 🙂
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Why so nervous?

Posted on July 25, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding

Last night I knew I was going to weigh in this morning and I was so nervous about it. I was nervous to the point that my stomach was in jumbles just thinking about it. Even this morning I was very, very nervous to get on the scale. I was lying in bed thinking, “Really? Some day my body isn’t going to be this big?? I can hardly imagine it…well, time to get up so I can weigh in and be done with it.”

I know I’m so scared I’ll see a gain. It’s that fear of not losing the weight that gets to me. It’s so ridiculous. I mean, my goal is to reach my goal weight by the time my husband graduates from dental school in May of 2011. I still have over a year and a half to lose 90 lbs. That’s plenty of time, so I should not be nervous.
But I am. Every week I am nervous about stepping on that scale.
Does/Did anyone battle this? I’d like to hear about your experiences.
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Weigh-In … Relief

Posted on July 25, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding

Today’s Weight: 218.5

Loss/Gain this week: – 0.5 lb
Total Loss So Far: – 12.5 lbs.
After such a large loss last week I was really nervous that maybe it was all a fluke and I’d be up this week. It’s not that I overate really, but I was worried that maybe it was too large of a loss and I’d be up this week to even things out.
Before getting on the scale I kept thinking, “Please, even just one pound down or a maintain…anything but a gain; but if I show a gain I can’t let it ruin my day.” (deep cleansing breath, hesitant step on the scale…) When I stepped on and saw “218.5” I was relieved. No great loss, but no gain either. Whew!
I was a teensy bit sad that it wasn’t more because of the back-to-school challenge, but I was so relieved that it wasn’t a gain that I couldn’t let myself worry about that fact.
I’ll just keep working on it and do my best to be patient. 🙂
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Bathing Suit Miracle

Posted on July 22, 2009 by Leah@MyNewEnding
I must start by saying that last summer I decided I wasn’t going to worry myself anymore with what people though about my fat body at the public pool. I wear a suit with a skirt and I’m not exposing lots of cleavage or even lots of fat back to anyone. I decided I was not going to miss out on spending time with my kids because of my weight. Shoot! I’m also one of the whitest people around, so even if I was thin I wouldn’t necessarily look good in a bathing suit with my white legs that don’t tan. I’ve enjoyed every visit to the pool since then.
This summer I realized that my suit is just so old and stretched out that I can’t even jump in the pool without worrying my straps will come right off. So, I decided that even though I’m working on weight loss I’m going to try and find an inexpensive new suit to finish out this year’s worth of swimming visits.
Well, as I was trying some suits on today I was taken by surprise as I realized …. (dramatic pause) …. I wasn’t dreading wearing a bathing suit out in public!! I was noticing that I’m standing just a little taller and my stomach is being held in just a little more. Yes, my thighs and pretty much most of me are still large, there are cellulite dimples and spider veins, but I didn’t loathe what I saw. And that surprised me!
The last time I went bathing suit shopping I was about 40-50 lbs lighter and I HATED the thought of wearing a suit in public. I only bought it then to go swimming with two best friends on a weekend trip and I dreaded every minute of it.
Not this time.
Today I shopped for a suit with the realization that I’m a work in progress. Hating myself and my faults isn’t going to change anything. I know where I need work and I’m working on it. So, while I’m still shopping around for a more affordable suit (couldn’t bring myself to spend $50 on one), I did learn that I am reaching a point where I can love my body…even in a bathing suit.
What a miracle!
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