…but I didn’t and I won’t.
Today’s Weight: 187.0
Loss/Gain: +/- 0.0
Total Loss So Far: – 44.0 lbs.
This past week has been very interesting. I appreciate all the comments about how to deal with sweet cravings. I have to say though that I haven’t been craving sweets – just food. Wednesday and yesterday I finally felt like I was getting back to my normal self. So, this is good…and probably why I have a maintain instead of a gain.
When I say I wanted to quit I’m very serious. I’d had it with myself and my weight yesterday. I had two meltdowns yesterday where I was in tears with thoughts of..
- It’s not fair!
- I’m tired of fighting this battle!
- I’ll never learn!
- I’ll never be thin!
- I’ll never overcome this issue in my life!
- I’m probably fighting something that’s just meant to be..a chubby Leah.
The second meltdown came right before bed and my husband talked with me about it (love dat man!). I had already talked to my good friend and weight loss support friend, Stephanie, earlier and thought I was over it, but apparently not. He listened, supported, blessed me with comments of how proud his is of me (more loving him…) and shared his words of wisdom.
Through my tears of frustration I told him, “For the first time in a LONG time I just want to quit, but I know that would be dumb. I can’t quit and I won’t.”
So that’s where I am today. I am very grateful for this maintain instead of a gain that I was expecting, and I’m not going to quit…to borrow the colloquialism… even if it kills me. =)
(Which we all know it won’t, because being healthy and fit never hurt anybody. *sheepish grin* )